Writing History
by Tomocopter
Summary: Where we come from always shapes who we are.
1. Danny

From the time he was five he knew could never live the kind of life his parents had.

That wasn't to say there was anything wrong with them, quite the opposite in fact. Danny's parents had managed to create a great life for their five children, in spite of all of the hardship they had endured during the Depression. They raised hard workers, and it was always assumed that their kids would want to carry on with that tradition. This all changed following their first trip to the local theater.

To the other kids it wasn't that big a deal. The entire purpose was to do something nice for Danny's older brothers on their birthday, and to give the whole family a little time away from the farm. The actual movie itself wasn't that spectacular - a rerun of an old silent picture which the theater could show without incurring too many costs. For their part, his siblings did enjoy it. For Danny, it was life changing.

* * *

Years later Danny's father would still tell the story of his son clinging to the seat in front of him, staring up at the screen with a shocked smile on his face, as if it was the first time he realized that their was a world outside of Kokomo. Honestly, it probably was. He danced out of that theater trying so hard to emulate what he saw on screen and coming far closer that a child of his age should have been able to. His family were just happy to see that the boy had enjoyed himself enough, even as he chattered away excitedly - '_Did you see the way he was dancin'! I bet I could do that! Will ya help me practice? I wanna be sure I'm doin' it right!_'. Even as an adult that didn't change much.

Opportunities to go to the movies became less and less as the kids got older. The Depression was never going to be that kind to a group of Indiana dirt farmers, and the addition of another baby (as loved as she was) didn't help matters. The kids had to learn young that money didn't grow on trees, and how tough it could be to survive. Danny's mother always believed that was the big motivator behind his dreams. He loved to sing and dance, and to a kid who grew up with nothing, the thoughts of fame and fortune had to be pretty intoxicating.

The older kids had to leave school at twelve - There was no way the government were going to spend money educating those kids any more than they had to, and Danny's parents could neither afford to pay for them to go to the private school a few miles over, nor could they afford to run the farm without their help. They all had to learn to support themselves early. Danny's brothers, when not helping out their dad, apprenticed themselves to builders and carpenters. His sister worked at the local general store, and made herself indispensable to the point that she as good as ran the place. From that age Danny focused on putting together the all of the money he would need to get himself to Hollywood.

It didn't come easily. Every month Danny had to donate a little of his paycheck to his parents to keep them all above water, and the small amount he was left with after going to see whatever movie was being shown in the theater that week was never gonna get him far. This never put him off though, if anything it made him more focused. None of his jobs ever needed total dedication, and none of his relationships ever got too serious (At least on his end). His siblings began to settle down, and his parents started to worry what would become of their youngest son (In the years after Danny's journey to Hollywood they could all laugh about that, and how plainly ridiculous their worries seemed in hindsight). They all worried that he would never get anywhere, especially not on what he was earning. This was until their fortunes changed suddenly.

* * *

Then end of the Great Depression seemed to hit Kokomo rapidly, and the end of 1938 affected the family for the better. Suddenly the farm, instead of just struggling to break even each month, was making a profit. People wanted their crops again, and they wanted them in huge amounts. They didn't need help from their kids, and the effect was huge. Instead of being years away from getting to Hollywood, Danny had the money in six months. He was barely twenty, and he was finally going.

The family didn't see him off at the bus stop - It was supposed to be a happy occasion, and crying parents didn't seem to fit the bill. They didn't throw him out the door by any means - He was well fed and triple checked before he was even let think about leaving. Of course it had to happen eventually, and after an all too brief goodbye from the people who had let him get to this point, he was gone.

Walking away from the farm seemed to last hours, even though he had walked this way every morning for as long as he could remember. It was different knowing nothing would be the same the next time he saw them. In spite of that he was happy, happy to finally leave, to finally see the city he had dreamed of since he was a kitten. Their would be friends there to see him off, good friends who had supported him since day one. That didn't mean nothing was missing. Unable to stop himself, he turned and smiled back at his family. Their seemed to be so many of them; parent, siblings, in-laws. He needed to see all that he was leaving behind. With one last wave, he knew he could leave . I'll make you guys proud. I swear.


	2. Sawyer

Sawyer was the first and only child born to Jared and Sarah McDermid. Jared had just barely gotten off the ground as a doctor, and while the addition of a child so early in his career may have proved a hindrance, there was no doubt that from the minute she was born Sawyer was one of those children who was deeply and utterly _wanted. _Whenever asked about her early years, Jared could happily talk at length about the happy little girl who at the age of two would beg her parents to put on their records, and dance around their house. It may not have been the most refined thing they had ever seen,, but even then her level of talent was undeniable. This was the Sawyer he liked to remember - The years which followed this didn't provide many happy memories.

Sawyer's parents were just planning on having another child when Sarah got sick. There had been a short, wonderful space of time when they could still hope that the changes she felt might have been down to pregnancy. It became clear pretty quickly that things weren't nearly that simple. This would be something that Jared would hold against himself for years to come - He was a doctor, it was his job, he should have been able to see she was getting sick, _he should have been able to fix her. _His daughter may have had a chance to really know her mother if he had acted quickly enough.

Sarah McDermid died on March 11th 1923, less than a month before her daughter's fourth birthday. Sawyer didn't remember much from that time - she did remember her mother asking her to dance for her a lot in the weeks before she died, when even standing proved too difficult. Sarah had been a dancer for a time, and really just needed to see that there was something of her in her child before she passed on. Looking back, Sawyer probably needed to prove that to her as well. It wasn't until after the funeral that she truly managed to cry, when it was just her and her father alone in their big house and she finally understood that Mom wasn't going to come home.

* * *

She started taking dance lessons about a year after her mother's death. It had mostly been Jared's idea. He was an involved parent, he had to be, but he was not totally equipped to deal with a child who had endured that level of emotional trauma that early. He figured the best thing for her would be to have an outlet, to have something to focus on that could both distract her and let her feel closer to her mother. Having something to remind him of Sarah couldn't hurt either.

Sawyer thrived in those classes. The raw talent she displayed in her early years as she danced around her sitting room came out in full force. She started in ballet, but as she became more focused on her developing her skills she spread out further, even beginning to take singing lessons. It did amazing things for her self esteem - it was difficult being the girl without a mother, and being able to excel at something she loved to such a massive scale was wonderful. She loved when her father came to watch her dance, when she could see how proud he was to know that she was following in her mother's footsteps. She knew that this was all she wanted to do.

Her mother had left some money that was to be given to Sawyer once she reached eighteen and by her calculations that was nearly enough to get her to Hollywood and support her for a few months while she found her feet. She did all she could to get whatever extra she needed, even began acting in small independent plays for a few dollars a night, just to get the funds together. It was while doing all of this that she really began to believe that she was good. That she might actually get somewhere.

* * *

Her father wasn't thrilled to hear about her plans. She was a clever girl, and could get into any college she wanted if she put her mind to it. More to the point, she was his little girl, and the only child he was ever going to get. The thought of just being separated from her was enough to drive him crazy, but that coupled with worrying about her safety was awful. He knew how some of those 'agents' operated, and what they could want in return for taking on a client. The argument proved futile - In the end Sawyer was always going to do whatever she set her mind to with or without his permission. All he could do was give her what she needed to be safe.

Sawyer left for Hollywood one week after her eighteenth birthday. She had been arguing with her father in the days leading up to her departure over her refusal to accept any extra money from him to support herself, but they had just about managed to put all of that behind them, at least on the surface. They would be separated by an entire country for the foreseeable future, they should at least be on good terms.

He drove her to the station on the day she left, and sent her off with a packed lunch and a hug. They both seemed calm enough as she left, but she remembered how he squeezed her so tight that it almost hurt. She buried her face into his shoulder, and breathed in that smell that was so undeniably _Dad's _for one last time before breaking apart and boarding. She remembered watching his face as her train departed for Hollywood, and seeing the tears he had tried so hard to hide. Only at that moment did she realise how difficult he must have found all of this.

* * *

She got herself set up with a hotel room and an agent soon after she had reached her destination. Farley Wink may not have been exactly what she was looking for, but at the very least he seemed to get some business, however small the parts may be. And that was where she managed to make her first friends in Hollywood, the most important of whom had to be Tillie. She may have only been a few years Sawyer's senior, but was undoubtedly a mother at heart. She took care of her in her first few months, and together with the others they even managed to get some roles in the cities underground theater scene. That was the only point in those first few years when life was truly good.

It didn't take long for Sawyer to be forced to face the uglier side of Hollywood. A bad relationship and even worse auditions had managed to destroy whatever romantic view she may have once had of the city. She watched as she was passed up for part after part, as less talented performers got the parts. It didn't take long for her to realise that they all seemed to be human. Her money began to run low, and she realised she needed a better source of income. She was forced to turn to Farley Wink.

It turned out Farley was more than happy to take her on as a secretary. She could type eighty words a minute and was pretty enough to stop any male clients from leaving, which was more than he could have asked for. The money was good, but life got worse. She began to realise that none of the clients ever got any big parts. They were lucky to get anything at all. It was here that it dawned on her that there would probably never be any parts for her.

She probably should have just gone home. It wasn't like there was much left for her here anyway, but she knew that she couldn't face it. She didn't want to go home and admit that she had wasted everything her mother had given her. That she had failed. And she did have friends in Hollywood, good ones too. She couldn't bring herself to just leave behind Tillie or Woolie, or even Cranston forever. It wasn't even a terrible life - She had a nice house, Sundays off and could afford to live in relative comfort. Almost none of her unmarried friends from back home were so lucky. That's what she told herself at least - it didn't provide her with as much comfort as she had hoped.

Everything might have been better if she had just stayed at home.


End file.
